Throughout our lives, we receive many powerful messages from society, siblings, media, peers, and coworkers. But none are more powerful than the ones from our caregivers. These messages affect our development well into adulthood, impacting our intimacy, parenting skills, and even career choices.

In Don’t Put Your Crap in Your Kid’s Diaper: The Clean Up Cost Can Last a Lifetime, author Thomas Gagliano helps parents separate the healthy messages from the dysfunctional ones to better create a nurturing environment for themselves and their children.

In a healthy family, the parents meet the emotional and physical needs of their partner. This type of environment allows the children to have the confidence they need to focus on themselves, rather than attempting to fix a void in their parent’s relationship.

In the vein of John Bradshaw, Claudia Black, and Dr. Abraham Twerski, Gagliano focuses on building self-awareness to improve the chances of making good choices—which, in turn, lead to healthy habits. Focusing on the underlying reasons for behavior, this book helps parents evaluate, change, and ultimately improve their parenting skills.